How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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knock knock go away

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's 6+2? 16

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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What is one plus one? I don't want to do math.

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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A black gay transvestite prostitute was walking alone through a dark alley one night. Business has been slow tonight, and she is looking for anyone she can find. Suddenly a man jumps out from the shadows, and brutally kills her. What do you call her? Marsha, as such was her name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops