How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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I Have a Black Friend

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What's red and bad for you teeth. A brick

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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