Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

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knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops