What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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if got a joke if fogot it

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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Ron Paul for President!

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Your mamas so poor she cant even afford to support a family

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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why was the jewish man so sad because his family was killed in a bus accident and he severed his spine and cant walk ever again and his insurance couldunt pay for the bill so he is now bankrupt so he borrowed from the mafia and now owes them 100,000 in a year or they will cut off his fingers and gauge out his eyes

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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