What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

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Dumb

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

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what is brown and sticky? a stick.

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Take part of what?

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops