Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

asdasdasdasd

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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