In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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Women's rights.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

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Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

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What happened to the twins? 9/11

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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what do you call your mom? mom

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Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Why does the chicken cross the road? 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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