- Anti Joke

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

knock knock whos there? nobody

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

How old are you? 7

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

A man walks into a bar

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

h

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

knock knock whos there? nobody

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

How old are you? 7

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

A man walks into a bar

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

h

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!