Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Fat people

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

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I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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What was hitlers least favorite pokemon? Hitler didnt have a least favorite pokemon because hitler died long before the idea of pokemon was created.

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

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2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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