Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

Matthew Wyckoff

roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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