Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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