So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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