Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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