Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Banana soup, Gorilla poop

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So there's this girl who really wanted red socks. She goes to the store, socks are $2. Well, that sucks, she thinks. I only have $1. So she goes home and asks her mom for a buck. Sure, the mom replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my vacuum cleaner. So the girl fixes the vacuum cleaner, mom giver her the buck. The girl goes to the store, but wait. Socks are $3 now. Girl goes home, asks her dad for a buck. Sure, the dad replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my car. Girl fixes car, dad gives het a buck. Girls goes to store.Well damn, the socks are $4 now. She goes home and asks her brother for a buck. Sure, her brother replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my computer. Girl fixes computer, brother giver her a buck. Girl goes to store and FINALLY buys the socks. She comes home. Mother dead. Vacuum cleaner exploded. For 1 month the girl mourns her mom. Finally she can wear her socks. Ah crap, car accident. After 1 month mourning her dad she can finally wear the socks. Well, turns out she can't. Brother dead cause of exploded computer. After yet another month of mourning, she can FINALLY wear her red socks. So she does. Suddenly the doorbell rings. The girl opens the door and there's a polar bear standing in front of her. What did the polar bear say? WELL NOTHING, BECAUSE POLAR BEARS CANNOT TALK!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

chuck norris can round house kick reasonably well

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I don't believe in giraffes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops