A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

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How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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what did the drunk man say to the bar tender? Hello good sir. Fine day today isn't it.

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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Why did jenny fall off the swing? ...Cause she has no arms Knock, Knock Who's there? not jenny

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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What did the Jew say to the Catholic? Nothing. He is a mute you insensitive moron!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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Why is Brodie Invited to Orlando? To make the beds

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I love alchohol!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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