why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up, you retarded black poet!

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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