Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Chlamydia

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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