It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

Where do dinosaurs go on vacation? Dinosaurs are mainly extinct except for a select few such as crocodiles, which are arguably ancestors of dinosaurs. With this in mind, dinosaurs do not go on vacation because they are dead.

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

Urban ghettos

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

knock knock who's there? faith

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Why did Larry the Cable Guy say "Git R Dun"? Because he thought it was funny, and so did a bunch of other people for some reason.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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