Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

Women deserve equal rights.

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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