who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

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How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops