George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Women's rights

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gays house! knock knock who's there? The chicken!

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because her family lived in the countryside and her family's income was very far below average and in the time of her miraculous breakthrough, automobiles were for the wealthy families and obviously her family was not wealthy. She wouldn't have been able to drive even if she wasn't blind or def. The economy pretty much hated her and her family.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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