Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

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A man walked into a bar, he spilled his drink.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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what color is blue? green

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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