What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

So this blonde walks into a library.

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

wanna hear a joke? no

What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

666

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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