A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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A man walked into a bar. I shot him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops