Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

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Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops