Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops