How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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karn chevalier

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops