What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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whats black? the colour

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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I rated up my joke then opened a new tab went to Anti-Jokes.com and rated it again. Problem antijokes?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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find the o 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duh its up top

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Why did the cop shoot his 4 year old son? Because the little bitch ate his leftovers

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops