Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A: Knock, Knock B: Whos there? A: Noone, the door and the visitor are both existential figments of your imagination.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

thumb_up thumb_down +11

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops