what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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9/11

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Ben Affleck

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

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No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

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A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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