What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

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Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

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Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

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butt bananan appe aeriugbahrei bviaAETRGNARJEOGBAEROUGBAREOGABINGBIFDUVHR9EH VARVBNF V BAR GABNER UGH 8U78 6 78 C 877 86IHUR T HUGU GHG HU GHUG ERHU; BGIU AHUB HOAU AOH;UGG RJHI NJB NBJ NAJF BNJ NJ IJ BB B NNB UB OH UAERFNSKALDF AHUAWRETFBSUGFHAUNVCHCIWERCFO4F[U940RU320RY4 33 4TVNO34INRT4`UR1C34BT4567=95084651898549+0451467016849=80 .97.8

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What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

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A woman walks into a bar.

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knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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whats brown and sticky a stick

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roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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