A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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first

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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your mom's so fat that even the biggest case of cancer couldn't brake through her flubber its so big

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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do u like chicken ? ....no good...cuz its for black people.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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What's worse than find ten babies in a trash can? Find a baby in ten trash cans.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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su algato es en fuego

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

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The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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