A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

Penis-biter

Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

How did the baby cross the ocean? It was stapled to a whale.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

How do you make a black person mad? Set his house on fire.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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