What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

how do you make a homosexual man have sex with a woman? shit in her vagina

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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