In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

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There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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Your mom is so poor that she collect food stamps is on welfare and lives in section 8 housing and cannot find a job that provides her a livable wage

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What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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