Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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