An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops