Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

lets bomb africa

once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

Know what's funny? Not these jokes!

How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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