Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

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Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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AND

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops