Did you hear the one about the flying turtle? No? Okay I'll tell you about it. So one day there was a flying turtle. His name was Larry and he was a turtle that can fly. However, nobody believed that Larry can fly and he wanted to prove it. So the next day George, who was a flying octopus, called Jerry on his cell phone and told him a story about a Larry. Jerry, who was a media reporter, was so offended by his story and called the police. Question: What did the police say? Nothing because it was a made up story

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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Click here for free sandwich.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops