Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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