Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Q:Which side of a chicken has more feathers? A:The outside.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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Oh...okay, good.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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