How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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I have a really funny joke.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops