What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

thumb_up thumb_down +47

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

thumb_up thumb_down +47

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +43

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a man walks into a bar and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops