What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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