Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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hi jonny

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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Whats two plus two Four!

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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