What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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what do you call a black man with a job? dont know, has never happened.

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Fine, ladies first.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

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Girls Lacrosse.

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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69

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One's fun to smash and the other is a watermelon.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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