To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

So this guy was making a sandwich...

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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