How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

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A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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9/11

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

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My peni s

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops