Pianos.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops