What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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Roeses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Name Is Dave, Microwave

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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If you are reading this you will soon suffer a slow and painful blow job... -_-

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Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops